I have a masturbator in my 5th grade class. the teacher told me ever since they caught him humping the desk in 2nd grade, they haven't been able to control him. he's even on medication but he will just do it in class
There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
Dude wtf I'm sitting behind some girl in class who is creeping on my facebook page. I don't even know who she is..
I give him blow jobs while he watches sports.. how am I not his gf yet??
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
Tonight I think I'm going to go out with a french braid so I don't wake up with puke hair. Thoughts?
And your mom thought you weren't even thinking about your future... she would be proud
eat the baked goods on the counter at your own risk... i made them while i was angry and drunk so they most likely have pubes in them
for future reference mormans are hard to crack but they give fucking amazing hand jobs.
Im sorry for drunkenly throwing your phone into the ocean. At the time it seemed like a good way for you not to text him
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The bouncer called to give me my shoes back when I got there he said " I'm all cool with fuvking bitches but when you try to to do it in my bar on the pool table you're gonna get chocked out every time"
At least you got your shooes
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
So the guy I hooked up with during welcome week just tried to booty call me from across the lecture hall at 9am. I don't think he gets how this works...
Hey sorry for calling you so much last night. I mixed your number with the pizza guys, and he was running late
Did I wash my face last night at your house? Where did my eyebrows go??
Are there rules against fucking your ex's dealer?
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