Just looked in the bathroom mirror before getting to this exam to see If I look as bad as I feel & the answer is no. I look amazing, even in yesterday's clothes
She's JV to your varsity
talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
Espresso. Can't sleep. Love puppies
my being single is dangerous.
Sign #1 that I'm not ready to be a mother: I'm shopping for "maternity fishnets".
Green mimosas i think yes
You could have chosen coming to fuck me over getting too hammered to drive. But you made your bed, and now you get to jack off alone in it.
He told me his cum shot melted the paint on his bedroom wall and asked if I want to see it
I just ate your leftovers whilst watching Garfield and Friends. Thank you across the board.
theres a canoe in our lawn. we dont own a canoe.
it was the only safe place
"They won't do it. I'm in the middle of darkness. " and "Probably going to die. I've been walking for 50 minutes in one direction" are the last texts I got from Steve
Go ahead without me. This chick is buying me drinks and just found out her husband is cheating on her. I think I just found the next level of revenge fucking: Scorned Trophy Wife Sex
Our son just found our secret Sex Dungeon that is no longer hidden in our basement. He brought his Xbox and the TV down there he is currently sitting in the sex swing playing video games. What do I do?
Randomize
