We video chatted for almost two hours. But I woke up with puke on my keyboard. The question of the day: were we still chatting when I vommed? No idea.
I just had someone I don't even know on Facebook message me saying it seems like I drink too much and should slow down.
With your fertility you would just get contact pregnant
The same guy who pierced my nipples just told me he can help tutor me in precalc.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Today wasn't Sunday Funday, it was more like Sunday god is taking a shit on my life day
its so sad we are done celebrating 21st bdays everytime one of us turned 21 everyone else got laid
Just consider it? What else do you have going on today that could be as awesome as a day full of lord of the rings and sex?
my vagina is starting to think like a penis, and I'm not even slightly worried
Apparently when it was last call I jumped up on the bar and told everyone to get the fuck out, which was immediately followed by a round of applause from the bouncers/bartenders and my tab getting paid as well.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What if there is no right person? Maybe it's just the right cat. Or the right 12 cats.
So is it safe to say that my only objective from last night is to finish this entire jar of peanut butter?
Watching Rudolph while stoned is practically a religious experience.
Had to drive my booty call home because he had an asthma attack after we had sex .. How was your night?
I'm not dealing with this wiskey dick shit, 2016 is the year of hard dicks
OH MY GOD MY UBER DRIVER IS PEEING BEHIND A DUMPSTER
Still got in the car though
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