I cant wait to get the disapproving look from this elderly black lady...
do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
You were shirtless with a cowboy hat in 15 degree weather then u shotgunned a can of mixed vegetable Progresso soup
Let's play a little game of "Last Night Never Happened"
They sat me on college avenue with a puke bucket and people were mistakenly throwing change in it. Got me enough money take a cab back to my apartment.
the paramedics asked what clubs id be in next weekend so they can plan ahead.
IDK DUDE BUT HE TIED IT WITH A SHOELACE SO I GOTTA FREE SHOELACE OUTTA THE DEAL. THIS GIVES A NEW MEANING TO LACED DRUGS
Only I could host a baby shower where the cops get called.
you got coffee,laid,and a sandwich. that never happens when I work
I peed my pants walking home last night... I just kept walking.
I'm pretty sure I asked his brother if he was gay while drunkenly falling to the ground.
Today's hangover is probably top 3 of all time. Just threw up in an envelope. I'm on the ferry and didn't want to get out to puke over the side because I thought I might fall in the river.
Yeah, great now I will be tampon girl
She was trying to be sexy well putting on my condom with her mouth when her cat pounced from the corner of the room witch caused her to gasp and inhale the condom
Randomize
