Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
I think we were cool up until the point where he saw that planned parenthood was on my speed dial.
in the bathroom helping her wash cum out her eye. pretty much explains my sex life
My mom wanted me and my brother to have some bonding time before I left for school. Our bonding time consisted of us smokin a few bowls then goin to Red Robin to cure the munchies. Ooo how I love family time :)
were you wearing a green and blue thong last night?
yes! wait why?
because i found it in my pocket this morning...
I'm reciting my presentation (beer in hand) on the porch to a snowmen audience.
He busted his lip while trying to keep from passing out in the pool. The hotel people don't seem to be too concerned that we're passing around a bottle of SoCo at 11 am.
Yeah her jello shots are the next closest thing to a lethal injection. That potent.
You know I'm having a rough day when I'm curled up in the corner eating Spaghettios.
I had sex on a dinosaur comforter, tell me that does not define my life.
Dude, don't put me in a suit and feed me liquor; I'll never go home.
I don't know what happened last night. But I just woke up in the high school boiler room
when I finally sobered up enough to get out of bed this morning I went to talk to mom and forgot that I had TITS written in big letters on both my hands. I love drinking games.
The sex was so good we high-fived after.
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