she said she didn't want to sleep with me again because I wasnt a generous lover. I ignored her slight moustache, didnt i? i think thats pretty damn generous
So the weirdest part of it all was he whispered in my ear "can i eat you out on your tredmill?" I dont find him attractive at all anymore
You should ask if we are margaritasing tomorrow. and yes i did just turn that into a verb
I stumbled into my living room at 4 a.m. to find him hurling my laptop across the room and his pants around his ankles. Clearly his night didn't go as planned.
just saw a guy driving a atv down the highway in a tux.... only in Iowa...
I can't find my underwear or one of my shoes but he baked me cookies for breakfast.
I'm on my fifth cocktail in twenty minutes. I don't think I will end this on two legs.
Someone fucked up, the stop Kony day is on 4/20,
there is a video of me from last night trying to light my breath on fire. that drunk.
I think I'm too tall to 69 successfully.
I think I might cry.
Just passed the animal clinic parking lot I had to pull over to puke in during welcome week. I can almost hear the dogs barking at my shame again.
Tackling and headbutting friends, running away and hiding from everyone, attempting to streak across campus, and then waking up with no sign of a hangover... happy 21 to me
I'm never going out with the ashleys again. it was whoreible. terrifyingly whoreible.
well, you know. whores of a feather.
Also I literally googled "how to fold socks" so that's how my day is going. How's yours?
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