You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
No seriously, I have to sell the house because my wife found out I'm gay.
She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
Well, I guess this was as good a night as any to find out I don't know how to use my fire extinguisher.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
I really hope that wasn't actually his first time. Because if my first time was anything like that I would NEVER have sex again.
tell me why there is a bowl of oatmeal from starbucks in my purse
She. Own s my pussycat. Roxk it like. The sun hitting the horizon
It hurts to peel the glue off my chest and i keep finding glitter in my hair.
I just wanted to decorate you...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Think I just saw your homeless guy on High Street. Did you give him back his crutch?
Yeah thats cool. We can play the alphabet game while doing bumps of coke in the back of his volswagon
Get in your clown car, pick up everyone you know, and head to the park. drunk Sledding grand prix tonight. winner takes home the leftover beer
I ask for a dick pic and he sends a picture of Dick Cheney. Who does that?
Unexpected pussy is the best kind. Never expected to get any from a stranger at my little brother's bar mitzvah.
Mazeltov!
He told me that losing me was the biggest mistake of his life. Of course it was. My tits are incredible and I know more about college football than he does.
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