the real housewives reunion is on...i wanna see if danielle can look any more surprised than the facelift allows
i wanna see dina punch her face back to normal
my phone cant type all the emotion im having
her cat watched me eat her out... I would use the alternate term for both of those things but it's too weird.
If it wasn't obvious enough to the cops that she was drunk, she threw in, "I like the colors of the lights because it makes purple."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I really like you, but I want to get to know you on a time when I am not at drugs.
FYI the landlord called, said we need to clean the puke off the side of the house...was someone on the roof lastnight??
my professor saw me buying beer for the super bowl and said go patriots. thats how i know im getting an A in his class.
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
Fucking her would be like seeing big foot, finding a four leaf clover , petting a unicorn, and arm wrestling a leprechaun in a matter of a 6 hour period
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know those twins i had a crush on in grade school? Just woke up between them. Best. Party. EVER.
Well while you were being a dick I was taping back together a cougars broken heart
I just plagiarized Dr. Curtis Connor's ideology from Spider-man in an essay on genetically engineered embryos. College: academic integrity at its finest.
He was smart enough to bring a condom to our study date so I mean I'm sure he'll do fine on the test
It's important to establish I slept with her BEFORE we officially became cousins-in-law.
were you aware we were supposed to be taking care of her hamster this weekend?
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