The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
weed brownie and a latte, breakfast of champions
Last night I ate parmesan cheese straight out of the container while watching Chelsea Lately. Look at what happens to me when you leave.
He is going to sleep with me. That's all there is to it. I'm 4 for 4 right now. I'm not making it 4 for 5.
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
He was going down on me as I discovered a spaghetti-O on my boob. Its been a while since I faked it.
You better of fucked him last night or do it now because he is buying all the roommates McDonald's.
She gives the worst handjobs, it was like raw meat on a cheese grater
After much deliberatipn and vodka, my favourite phrase of Christmas 2012 is "penis of last resort"
I don't know if I want context or not...
Context involves faux incest and champagne. Id go into detail but im on shot number 5.
Btw, I feel the need to make sure we have no misunderstanding about this. So here goes. I'll happily mess around with you again. However, I probably won't do it while you're dressed like a creepy clown. Or any clown.
He kept telling me that he didn't serve two tours in Iraq for my bitch ass to drink banana rum.
I'm trying to find a place to hide weed in my mother in law's house...
Married life problems?
My hands smell like penis... I can't even remember the last time i touched a penis, but my hands say i did. Oh the mystery.
We turned his nipples into a drinking game.
mother daughter bonding time. she's helping me make jello shots.
Randomize
