At least make sure they are 18
Why
There was a pool of blood on my desk and we still don't know who it belongs to. missed a good party, man.
I just saw a girl walk by me wearing a "kiss me I'm pro choice" shirt. Is that a signal for easy access?
Maybe we should try and tone it down a notch. The neighbors changed the name of their wifi network to "i can hear you having sex".
I'm not a pervert.. I just like to be naked...
I brought his matress to the living room we're laying on it listening to rick james drinking vodka
well its a long story but basically i overcame many cockblocks
Na Im fine, just need to un-grow this vagina I've developed
Half way through sex he whispered in my ear, " your the second best I've ever had" then proceeded to tell me to sit on his face.
I just swallowed confetti and motor-boated some guys beard...#happy2015
He just felt my tits to find out which piercing I lost.
He has a beach house and a Simba tattoo. Our wedding is next Tuesday, hope you're free.
I'm sorry i showed you my boobs.. I probably shouldn't have done that.
I just gave a fucking twenty minute blowiob.. I'm a GOOD girlfriend.
He’s tiny, hairless and humps my leg when he wants sex. He’s basically a chihuahua
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