how in the hell can u get pulled over when ur car is parked.
The kid taped his penis down so that he wouldn't get a boner while dancing with girls. Oh these middle school man whores never cease to amaze me.
You were telling me to give my phone mouth to mouth so it wouldn't die.. Should i be worried for you?
2nd night home for break and we had to call the fire department to keep the house from burning down. At this rate I'll be lucky to see you next semester.
at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.
He called my vagina a rainforest. This is coming from a guy whose pubes are longer than his dick.
I could hear them screwing through my bedroom wall again this morning, so I started beat boxing to the tempo.
Unless you have figured out how to blow me through the phone don't drunk dial me.
Sometimes familiar penis is best. Its like comfort food for your vagina.
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
i wonder if cab drivers are trained in the art of delivering girls back to their dorms on Saturday mornings. because mine was so nice that he dropped me off at the back of my building so no one would see me.
end of the world party next friday. virgin sacrifice. tell me you know someone whos still a virgin
Well I can't message him and be like "hey I was behind you in CVS a month ago and I remembered your last name and DOB and looked you up on fb and added you so wanna hang out"
WELL I DIDNT KNOW IT WAS POSSIBLE TO COME SO HARD YOU HAVE AN ASTHMA ATTACK BUT HERE I AM
Not even a manhunt keeps my brother and his friends from the bars
Randomize
