im pretty sure there are laws against slapping prostitutes
i'm pretty sure there are laws against prostitutes.
Hooked up with my old baby sitter last night, so what do I do? As I was sucking her tits I decided it would be a good idea to say " goo goo gah gah"....it wasn't a good idea.
i am not allowed to pick the men i sleep with anymore
I woke up this morning with gum gluing my ass cheeks together..
I can't decide if I actually want to know or not..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm cheering for the colts this year. I basically have to since my fake says i'm from indianapolis
Once I saw his penis, I knew I made the right choice
How in the hell did I take a shot of whiskey to the eyeball last night?
Seriously, this apartment is covered in body glitter. This chick musta been a huuuuuge slut. How do you get it across every surface?
Do you have any forwarding contact info?
Of course it may just be the context. A dish of dog food would look lovely next to your breasts.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Text me if something catches fire and I will put pants on
He tried to get me to go back to his place on the condition that he has 6 cats. I was very tempted but I said no. Hoping to go see the cats tomorrow
I literally heard an 'oh my god' when the shirtless Tongan appeared.
Let me atleast have my coffee before you start talking about your penis
Man I can't believe I took a huge dump in a public garden
If she didn't have scissors in her hand I would have motor boated the fuck out of her when she was done cutting my hair.
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