The girl sitting next to me in class is writing her to-do list under the title 11/31.
I just made a 90's Nickelodeon TV theme song power hour mix...I don't want to build it up but your head might explode
We had unprotected sex and she's eating life cereal for breakfast. The universe is telling me get the plan b for her
It's called penis withdraw. Or alcoholism. I get them confused these days.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I know i'm the slutty cousin, but be honest. have you ever got your nose ring caught on a guy's zipper?
Well look at it this way, if he should happen to get into a terrible accident within the next 2 days, its okay.. i have his dental records on my ass cheek.
You drunk invited us to do an intervention for you.
Get to the bar. Power hour leading up to the rapture.
Wonderful brian is stoned out of his mind, floating in a lawn chair in the hot tub eating a giant plate of macaroni and staring at the moon
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
I made it crystal clear I'm only upset because he's not anywhere fit to be a father of my unborn zygote
I woke up with my face covered in mustard. Your mom said I ate hotdogs like a pornstar
I HAVE TOO MICH DICK TALKING TO ME IDK WHAT TO DO.
Can't talk, ducks in the car
Holy. shit. Chris has no pants on. In public. Fuck. Need you.
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