I love that she's always that person who people think it's a good idea to invite her to something. and then she's there and you realize, "nope."
As your boss, I feel obligated to tell you that turning our management meeting into a kegger may just be the best idea you've given me yet.
Shit. Come in my room. Bring a trashcan and an icepack
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
i don't think my dad can get all that mad since he got arrested for almost exactly the same thing last weekend
He's like a perfect storm of amazing hair and horrible judgment.
This year i'm grateful for nothing other than the discovery that the uncircumcized rumors about him were wrong
I've liked him since I puked on him on my birthday so I want it to be special.
Careful, it's a slippery slope to discovering you're bisexual...trust me.
you took a picture of the hospital bathroom and sent it to me
You tried to use him as a battering ram. I'm 99% certain that's why he left.
she just kept straddling the railing to the stairs and shouting "come on Seabiscuit, lets win this for America."
He came into my room last night and started peeing underneath my desk, I told him the bathroom was the next door over.
I’M PUT OFF FROM FOOD RN BC EARLIER I GOT SOME WATER AND I WAS 4 SIPS IN WHEN I NOticed A FUCKING BURGER KING F R Y IN MY D R I N K
My head is bruised from having sex in the backseat of an explorer last night.
Randomize
