They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
So, just so you know... Your vasectomy worked.
bonus
I was looking at some smoking pipes on amazon the other day and realized that work people could look at my history and do a drug test. So I immediately started looking at Sherlock Holmes hats.
She brought an overnight bag to my party. Might as well have shown up wearing only a thong and a bottle of whip cream in her hand.
my facebook is like a giant collection of my one night stands
when i grow up i'm putting garbage disposals in all showers of my house so when you vomit in the shower its easy clean up
Just hooked up on shake weight girl's dad's porsche. What are YOU doing with your life?
Only way we know if he truly fits in is if we spill straight vodka on the floor and his first instinctnis to lick it up. Otherwise, gameover.
I am three bowls, two beers, and a muscle relaxer into babysitting. What are you doing.
But Monday we'll be living in a post-apocalyptic hellscape. Also, I'm going to a champagne tasting.
I'll tell these girls I'm like the pet adoption center...don't play with it if you're not taking it home.
Naw man, if he's crazy enough to jerk off on a public bus he's too crazy for me to fuck with
Of course it may just be the context. A dish of dog food would look lovely next to your breasts.
I can insert a female catheter, but I cannot grill a cheese.
when the cops came she just started yelling at them "Fuck the police! freedom of speech bitches!"
Randomize
