I'll collect that couch/porn sloopy beedge tomorrow just FYI
He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
wait.. the condom broke. ehh whatever i think im already 2 months pregnant
so I woke up this morning and on their fridge, the first item on the shopping list was my virginity.
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
Due to our sore throats we are now doing bong hits with cranberry juice to sooth it.
If I die tonight and was cremated, you could probably get high off the smoke.
Please make sure you have solid number of friends around you that wouldn't be afraid to break a bottle and stab someone. If you're planning on drinking all of that, you're going to need a safety net.
My little brother found me on Instagram. If I'm not already the shame of my family, I'm about to be.
She didn't complain to the library attendant about us being too loud. She complained after you grabbed her highlighter off the table to stir vodka into your tumbler with.
I decided to do drugs in front of her because if anyone can handle the truth it's a ghost
You wanna see what happens when frozen corn meets an unhappy Andrew's face?
You almost got us killed.
YOU’RE WELCOME FOR NAVIGATING YOU TO A ONCE IN A LIFETIME EXPERIENCE.
We're just starting to open presents and I already need a shot. This is gonna be a long Christmas day.
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