Did you call me this morning? I was really drugged up and don't remember.
Have a good day. My vagina shrank.
So apparently I told him I was off to go "whore skipping" and I disappeared into the night skipping down the street. I know this because there's video.
Why do you apologize after every time we have sex?
I had never watched a guy jack off to me before, but let me tell you, it was a very uncomfortable experience.
After waking up today, I would like to find the Jesus preachers on campus to ask for help in asking for forgiveness to God.
She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.
After much deliberation I've decided to name my penis "Arthur", hope your mom's surgery goes well.
Telling me that I would make a great "occasional fuck" was not appreciated.
My penis just literally said "Yaaaaaay!!!" It's the first time it's spoken out loud. Before this we could only communicate through rudimentary sign language
He just kept repeating "not with an octopus" over and over for hours. Soooooo Porn Dare was a succes.
Roomie questionaires don't ask any of the important questions like "how do you feel about one night stands" and "will you judge me post-walk of shame"
I feel so bad for your roommate
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
Guys are like someone else's baby; i'll play with them but if responsibility is involved i'll hand them off.
i pushed adam in a shopping cart for 15 blocks, then we realized we left tyler downtown
did you go back and get him?
nah we went to a karaoke bar instead, so worth it
Fuck you, i'm all jacked up on bananas lets go somewhere
Randomize