Everyone just saw your hickey on TV and on the jumbotron at the hockey game.
Thanks dad.
and all i could think was, am i really about to have sex with someone who still thinks that pee comes out of the actual vagina?
Is it wrong that I didn't stop masterbating when the credit card company called?
did you answer or finish?
both
New channing tatum movie.
I'll bring my vibrator.
My dad walked in on me masturbating in my own apartment.....my own apartment!!
We have literally factored in $2200 for bail money in the budget. This vegas trip will be out of hand. We are signing confidentiality contracts.
I don't go on dates. I watch tv and play with dicks. dinner is a situation.
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
I'm sitting next to a ginger. She is decked out in olive green. Gingers fucking love olive green.
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
We just had a 30 min argument on the actual birth date of Jesus, it ended in my brother and ain't cursing each other and an 8 yr old answering it by using Siri.
I take pride in being a married 31 year old who sleeps on her best friend's bathroom floor from time to time.
Stop calling my penis "Fat Jesus"
Drunk sperm are not productive sperm.
Your dick. My mouth. We have 20 minutes.
Randomize
