Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
dude i woke up to her making a statue of my morning wood for her sculpture class. HOW THE FUCK do you think i feel about her?
Yeah not really sure what I said but I remember "douchebag" and "fuck your own face"
To a 70 year old lady?!
Just got invited out of group to take shots after hearing her gay friend say "why would I give him my alcohol so you can suck his dick. It's going to be a good night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
...he tried to burn down someone's house once. ABORT ABORT ABORT
I'm sorry, the person you're trying to reach is WAYYY too high to deal with this right now.
my grandma just gave me a shoebox fulled to the top with tootsie rolls and condoms with a not that said "enjoy college, find a big cock" i'm not sure how I feel about this
When you wake up with a bow tie and mustache drawn on your penis, you know you had a good night.
I just had sex in the footy bunny pajamas my mom bought me for christmas. Tis the season
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
2015 is the year I FINALLY ALMOST had enough dick to satisfy me.
Ok, not to minimize the significance of that beautiful anecdote from your childhood, but here's a video of my penis.
Seriously if we go to rome ur fucking me into the sunset on a wrought iron balcony overlooking Vatican City
Met a beautiful Irishman two nights in a row. I may never come back.
I may or may not have just had sex in the bed of a pick-up at a drive-in movie theater.
Hey, I'm sleeping in your car...lol just knock on the window in the morning
Randomize