Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
he puts the penis in happiness.
If we keep treating our bodies like amusement parks we have another 10 years left at best.
Yep just saw a license plate that read "taint 2" which implies there is a "taint 1". Only in Florida
You just kept saying "I want my babies to look like you."
I really want to go out tonight but part of me wants to be able to honestly tell the judge tomorow that I didn't
The usual, bring face make up, I have a weird gash on my nose, probably from my one night stand
Call me when you get back form court. Hopefully its not later than noon. Just remember..win or lose we still booze.
Ugh contemplating vodka and chocolate protein powder as this Capri sun and vodka isn't really cutting it
sex, shower, sex, ice cream sandwiches?
So when he asked me to go on a date tonight, I didn't think the words "have you tried a suppository" would be part of the evening.
They had an Olympic theme party at her work yesterday. She brought home her fake gold medal and hung it on my cock after she rode me.
I'm not 100 percent on this, but I think I just shit a lump of cement. What the fuck happened last night?
I should probably apologize for licking you last night since you drove me home, but I stand by my decision
Be there in 6 mins I’m smell like fireball. and strippers and need to use your showers before go home
Randomize
