Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
Whoa Z and x make the same sound
its like he missed a chap in the "being a guy" handbook and read the bible instead
We've only been driving for two hours and I'm already down 3 vicodin...I'm not going to survive this family vacation.
I swear if his heart was half the size of the cum stains he's left on my sheets we would have the perfect relationship
I turn the corner to find her walking in the front door in a tee-shirt, two different shoes and no pants. All she said to me was "I'm sad"
You had a towel around you and you called it your shot bib.
We're not even buying beer. Just vodka. In pre-retrospect this was a bad idea but we're doing it anyway
My neighbor caught me peeing on his rose bushes at 2 in the morning while wearing my Santa hat. My sex appeal has never been higher.
Yours weakened by children. Mine weakened by a forearm sized cock for 8 years.
No im just getting a road beer. You got my pants?
I wouldn't call that a crush. It was more of a minor brain aneurism.
We accept all of your sexual lovers, Jewish, episcopalian, atheist. Dick is dick
I'm going to preface tonight by saying that I'm sorry for tequila, shopping carts, and having to chase me.
I told you that we shouldn't have sex. You said "its okay I already saw you pee" apparently that was convincing
Randomize
