hey is it cool if i invite some fat girls to the party so i can be the skinny one?
yeah okay. but if i take one home with me you have to come over in the morning and tell her to get her shit and go.
the worst part of it wasnt him peeing on the xbox. it was when he showed me his penis and made a kissy face at me. THAT was painful.
THERE IS PRACTICALLY A BEER FUCKING WATERFALL
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
So the night ended when we tried making fireworks out of gunpowder and oregano. You can figure out how that went.
My Yoga instructor is playing the music from 'Requiem for a Dream' it makes me very reluctant to put my ass in the air
Unless you've also woken up wearing a poncho and a ring pop, I suggest you don't judge me. Okay, I even judged myself for that.
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
How did "late lunch" turn into 8 solid hours of drinking??? I feel like death.
I guess my vagina missed him because it called and left a 5 min. message. Color me impressed
He just showed up on my porch naked with just a blanket and a trash bag
You peed on a pole and declared to a cop that it was your pole and yelled at him to not even look at it, and then yelled at all of us for looking at it.
oh man that would be weird.. i feel like we should do dirty things before anything super intimate like a massage.
I’ve looked at so many mouse vaginas in the past week
Is there a subtle way to tell him he needs to hydrate? 8 years of yoga and kegels. He has no idea what I’m going to do to him this weekend
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