yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
If someone cant be won over with guacomole and tequila they are not worth your time.
I just remembered before I gave him head I couldn't find a hair tie and he offered to hold my hair up. Maybe we were wrong.. Maybe he does have a heart.
Just spent a extra 20 minutes on the phone with the lady from unemployment talking about how to make the best brownies.
frankly if you're gonna get kicked out of your place, hooking up with your gay roommate's boyfriend would be the most entertaining way to do it.
Were you really trying to feed me potato chips while I was sitting on the toilet?
the back of my hand read, "say no to drugs." my palm read, "say yes to shots." when the fuck did I write that?
So somebody asked her is she's okay.She turned around,started running and screamed "Ballet is running through my veins" before doing a small pirouette.It's amazing how she managed not to fall.
The girls danced. I drank. Then I danced cause I was drunk. Then I ripped tim's shirt off cause I'm awesome.
Apparently you missed the drunkest me ever documented. I slept on the hardwood floor and left my pants on the porch to give u a frame of reference.
Herpes is not a lady problem you can solve with shower beers and kissing boys
I NEED A MOM FRIEND. NOW.
I probably would do him if given the chance but how awkward would Bible study be after that.
In hindsight I shouldn't have been blasting Antichrist Superstar if I didn't want to seem suspicious driving up to a Catholic church
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