operation have a gay friend backfired
all you kept yelling was "i'm bored and i'm sober"
it was really awkward. it took him like like 2 minutes to realize who he was jacking off to. he stopped mid-stroke. such a small small world
i told you not to try chat roulette
its a sex-hate relationship...no love involved
my host sister just stared at me as i knocked over the lamp, then took out all my chocolate, walked into the bathroom, and locked the door. i'm officially the worst exchange student ever.
Unless you can cure my hangover with your penis I'm not interested.
Yeah I'm a responsible adult man but I legally unbind myself from anything that occurred that evening and am in no way responsible for those actions.
I drunken agreed to go wedding dress shopping with a stranger at the bar yesterday. She sent me an email asking what days I am free.
I haven't even booked my flights yet and I have my drug supply sorted
Nothing says I'll be 22 tomorrow like washing the vomit out of your hair at 4pm
I saw your dick pic and thought there goes the last thread of my heterosexuality.
NO. FUCK YOU. I HOPE SOMEONE REPLACES YOUR LUBE WITH HOT SAUCE.
I don't know whether to be insulted or flattered that I am being propositioned to have a threesome only if I wear my cat onesie
To be honest. I have two poptarts in my jacket pockets. No one knows. I am pro stealth.
I currently don't understand fingers.
Randomize
