these two guys are about to go shot for shot with syrup
now he is talking to a potato
My entire life is one complicated drinking game
is wine microwaveable?
I'm proud of us, I'm cleaning up the place and I haven't found a single beer can that isn't empty.
grab my backpack.....its in the fridge
If i apologize for punching you in the liver repeatedly will you explain where the grass stains on my shoulders came from?
HAPPY NEWYEARSM FAGTRON! GETTING HEAD IN TAXI I WIN
We should search craigslist for porches to sublet.
I'm not drinking anymore...and by that, I mean until St. Patrick's Day.
If you come home soon there's a stripper in the shower. Don't be alarmed
Today's weekday brunch started at 2pm, and consisted of $7 of sandwich and $50 of cocktails. Also, I hustled the bartender for about $3 playing nickel poker, but he may have been letting me win. Either way, he didn't get into my pants.
At this point I think you're just judging my taste in men
I went in for a high five.. He went in for a kiss.. Today is a good day
My pizza delivery guy was so hot I was like omg please let this be the beginning of a porno
Does the girl you just banged want anything from Taco Bell?
Randomize
