oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
I'm drinking in the hospital parking lot.
WHO ATE OUR COOKIES WHAT THE FUCK THOSE WERE GOURMET
You kept yelling that her vagina looked like a hatchet wound.
it was a 10 min screaming orgasm. i don't care that you were next door and didn't appreciate all the noise.
Was it fun? The night started with home made Jager and ended in him falling out of a tree with a pocket full of house numbers...you tell me.
Is it bad to have a craving for speed? I feel like my nose is thirsty.
Come on down you're the next contestant on "lets go drinking!"
We turned a watering can into a margarita bong.
I have the WORST cramps EVER. I think this is gods way of saying 'you're welcome, last warning. stop being a slut.'
Why do guys insist on chatting me up this early in the morning? I'm just like "Dude, I look like the bastard child of Einstein and a troll doll. Let me eat my Hot Pocket in peace."
"I licked someones beard, because I can."
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
my Mom is now my Eskimo sister... she fucked my ex in my bed and took a selfie
I live in Vegas It shouldn’t be this hard to find a penis looking for a night of no strings attached sex
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