stop texting me from phones in the verizon store and pretending to be guys i talked to when i was drunk. its confusing.
There is something depressing about eating toast in a dark living room by myself using a paper plate that says: "Let's Party!"
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
i had to sit with a fan pointed directly to my vag for a good 10 minutes
Well the walls are thin and I can hear the couple next door having sex. I think their dog is somehow involved.
Dreamed I made out with a stranger after falling out of a car, let's make this happen tonight.
i just snorted adderall with my patient's rolled up EKG strip from our last clinical. nursing school has ruined me. thought you would appreciate this.
Dude id rather jerk off w a fist full of bee's than deal with that girl that never stops talking.
Well you know it's going to be an interesting night when the bathroom attendant is doing hail marrys
Well I'm missing half a toenail if that's any indication of my night
I just fell out of my doorway to go to class so if that doesn't describe how my night went idk what will
We got really high and he took a green marker and made my vagina into a Christmas tree.
No he reached for my hand at the beach. I pretended to be a seagull.
Is there any reason why a taxidermic donkey head is in the shower?
Chaz got drunk and passed out so we superglued a kazoo to his mouth. Listening to him Panic when he woke up was fucking hilarious.
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