oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
I just cut my nipple shaving
Sometimes I stick my finger in my own ass and pretend it’s a vagina. I think it’s kinda weird. What do you think?
Its like im going on a blind date, but ive already had sex with her
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he breathalyzed me before we had sex.
the best part is my dad got arrested for the same thing at the same bar 30 years ago... so he cant be mad
Apparently in gay bars the restroom signs are just a formality. Its a free for all in there
How creepy of a mustache can you grow by wednesday night?
He filled our room with little plastic cups of beer so the only way I could get out was by drinking them all.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was to the point where my socks were drenched in ranch dressing
I just yelled at a bunch of girl scouts for yelling "cookies" to loudly. That hungover
One of those days. Also, your pants are now in my protective custody.
I'm just the girl with the breathalyzer keychain, and I embrace that.
Also, your girlfriend apologized to me about yesterday. That was nice of the cunt.
His ass is a ten, but his personality is a two. Which would average to a six if I didn't have to figure in apologizing to all and sundry. In short hard no. Get a new wingman.
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