You asked him to stand still, you put your leg on his shoulder, started dry humping the air
my mom just texted me to let me know that Hooters is hiring
i wish my mom had big dreams like that for me
There's been so much talk around your vagina it's like a local celebrity
we cant have a funnel and a dog. thats a lot of responsibility
Apparently she held up my head the entire 40 minutes, convincing the cab driver that I was okay
I spent an hour trying to convert bar outfits to church outfits. Its hard.
I'm not considering your visit a success until we've fucked every cock in the ethnic rainbow...between the four of us we should have it done by x-mas
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
I know you're on a date and I should leave you alone but about twenty minutes ago I realized I haven't been spanked in years so if you're still looking for a birthday present, you know, consider it.
He propositioned me for a threesome once so yeah I'd say he has what it takes to run for public office
Would it be creepy if I masturbated with my face in the pillow he slept on last night? Cuz I'm pretty sure that's about to happen
I'm good. Got my nipples pierced and threw my back out. 🙌
He stopped mid thrust ... To check snap chat .. From his roomie
Hiding in a kitchen with no pants orange juice abs a pillow...please joun
I haye tequella
Apparently when you start crushing adderall and blending them into your margaritas calling them blenderalls you have "a problem" WTF
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