dude...I wrote 15 jersey shore quotes on her body. she is going to do the walk of shame with snookie on her forehead.
He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
You can't use the, "think about your future" line when trying to convince me to save some weed for tomorrow.
I used the lotion his mom gave me for christmas to give him a hand job. It felt so wrong.
Did you rob me and blame it on the strippers?
stuck in the elevator with that hot guy from the 3rd flood. Worried he can smell my spray tan and desperation
Oh my gosh they are following me around the bar
Blow your rape whistle
I'm at about main and main street
i don't know what part of 'duct tape bikini waxes' seemed even a little okay in our drunk minds, but i'm never drinking with your sister again
there is nothing worst than getting kicked in the face by a stripper
You leaned over so she could squirt ketchup in your hair and then started chanting "KETCHUP NIGHT!! KETCHUP NIGHT!!!"
So the other day we finished having sex and he literally said "what are we going to do about your vagina?" Like, I hadn't even dismounted him yet.
When I get off work and you're not around to hang out with all I do is lay around in my underwear and eat potatoes.
well we woke up in different beds than the ones we originally fell asleep in, you were butt naked, and your boyfriend was sleeping on a cot in the middle of the kitchen. that might be why he's mad.
You got into an extremely loud argument with a juggalo and slapped him, he started crying and everyone cheered.
I remember that, it happened before I started drinking. I thought you said I did something shameful?
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