Want to have sex later?
This feels like a trap
I wish I could still say I don't know that you taste like bad ice cream.
well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
Well the weddings in 4 days so I already got the eightball lined up and the wii fit all warmed up. Still wanna bet I wont lose 20 pounds by the wedding?
Also, turning on the light this morning was a 3 step process. Way too hungover.
Well you tried to pay for a drink with your keys for one...
There's something very strange about masturbating in a hotel room. I feel like I'm cheating on my room...
We watched scrubs, then I got a shower blowjob which led to shower sex and the living room floor sex. Now she's baking cookies. I may not be studying, but I'm doing something right.
Got back to find Sarah in her underwear eating peanut butter and watching Arrested Development with the thermostat at eighty.
I'm taking a dab in mourning of how long its been since I smoked with you guys.
In Punta Cana for my bachelor trip, hopefully tomorrow my passport is blacklisted
So, i might have left my morals back in 2011.
Even my conscience is telling me to take this Wednesday's exam buzzed.
I realized today that the only things I'm guaranteed to have with me at all times are lipgloss, condoms and a USB drive. hmmm...
Stop inviting Kevin over. The dickless wonder started playing some strange Sci-FY music and speaking an alien language and the girls split.
Randomize
