best part, i was ridiculous and none of them were judging me bc they didn't want my vagina. it was like i was a pretty painting
It only takes once for you to drunkly piss on a chick for her to lose interest in you.
I just woke up to find the whole kitchen sick had been converted into a gravity bong.
Have you fucked anyone in the hospital yet because obviously this illness isnt worth it unless you do. I MISS YOUR HEALTH
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Today has been the most awkward masturbatory day of my life. Possibly even more awkward than when my mom found my vibrator on Mother's Day.
I thought monday through wednesday was a YOLO free zone.
Even dream me is a champ at smoking weed
I hate vagina strikes, but I must not stray from my path. My boyfriend will know the true meaning of blue balls.
I currently need breakfast in bed, morning sex, and a bourbon and diet coke. Make this happen
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He sent me a picture of Reese's peanut butter cups next to his dick. Of course I went over.
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
I am at a cat party and I just witnessed people lapping vodka out of a bowl for a contest. Lol
Family acid trip. They're welcoming me into the family.
What. The. Fuck.
Family acid trip.
Listen I don't care what it's called as long as it's drugs
i hooked up with all four beatles on halloween get on my level
Randomize