physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
Hey guess what I got for Valentine's day? Debt and blue balls.
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
Just opened a beer with eyelash curlers... miss you.
Just found a hole in my wall with your left shoe in it.
How do you say "I'm sorry I beat you up while cumming" in German?
there's a girl in the coffee shop just eating a pint of ben & jerry's
SMART GIRL
Drunbk and roasting marshmallows on my stove. Accidentally singed the catr's fur but she'sd alright.
I'm about to fuck a girl in an old school Tony Kukoc Bulls jersey. About to earn my third championship ring in sex
I have to sanitize my nipples and its just to cold in here for it to be ok
So I'm not dead, but close call. I think I can handle one more bar.
Dude, I woke up with wet dollar bills in my boxers where did you take me???
One of my pillows is missing but it's cool because there is a beef stick.
How does one take the "you're the best sex I've ever had but I'm marrying someone that's sub-par in the sack" mind fuck?
I pity the fool.
Thanks Mr T.
Randomize
