We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
we should go somewhere reaaaaaal shady
he was fingering me to the beat of a lady gaga song. new high? new low? i don know, but i came, so whatever.
When my girlfriend drinks sangria it's like winning the vagina lottery
had another sex dream about alec baldwin...
so I woke up and found tortilla in my belly button
Completly hung over at midnight, I knew there was a downside to drinking at 2pm
We woke up at 7:30am. We got a 30 rack, yelled at all the freshman shackers walkin back to their dorms, played a game of beer die, and boned all before 11:00am. I found my soulmate
I almost tried texting you with my pipe. Holy fuck this is good shit.
She said pants are for pussies while spooning peanut butter onto her frosted flakes with a serving spoon. She's not even high yet.
May or may not have just put tequila in my special "kids+" orange juice fortified with vitamins a, b, c, d, e, and now t.
I was walking out the front door and heard his roomate say "It looks like you need a chiropractor." I think my work here is done.
We had an in depth conversion about the best way to take a dick pic. Both with and without mirrors.
It's official. Post baseball sex is better than post hockey sex. I hope the Blue Jays win the world series.
Would you like to get a drink then hook up or reverse order I don't really care. Hopefully you can keep this between us.
Randomize
