Every time we have sex I can't stop thinking about Jesus
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
New swimming pool is best sex toy ever. We are pioneering the doggie-style paddle.
we smoked out of your homemade aunt jamima bong
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there are teeth marks in the soap. why are there teeth marks in the soap.
You know how I got mad at him for making out with his formal date? Apparently I fucked mine. I'm guessing any exclusivity is out of the question.
It was pretty bad. Like cum-on-my-face-while-singing-Let-It-Snow bad.
Idk we were snorting lines and making out in the stall while these people were cheering us on, on the other side. And that's when I realized he wasn't the only guy in the girls bathroom.
wow thanks for pushing me towards an older man
you gotta start somewhere if you're going to be a trophy wife
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He is so sweet! He thanks me for sending him dirty pix. I should keep him.
His brother just asked him in all seriousness if it would be cool if they became eskimo brother brothers.
Ted is on HBO in 20 minutes...not sure if this or the drunken dance party I had at the bar to a N*SYNC Christmas song 20 minutes ago is the highlight of my week so far.
I was figuring I'd break up with her after work, but before Taco Tuesday
You sluts I'm so proud of you. You're both wearing underwear.
I shit myself and fell down the stairs and I’m still finding shit In those pants.
Randomize