Remember when you gave their 80 year old doorman a line of molly at 5am?
Send us your Text From Last Night!
I walk into the pharmacy and I'm like "I need three morning after pills" and the guy was like "uhhhh". All I said was "we didn't plan it, we all just got laid the same night"
i believe in u and ur pee
At the light, his mom pulled up next to us while I was giving him road head. He forgot to tell me she was meeting us at the movie. So long story short, I convinced her I drove myself, pick me up in 20.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
New rule: if someone asks if you would like to snort a xanax the answer is no.
we had sex while we waited for the thai food... a which will come first type of situation
I'm literally the definition of crunk, sunburnt, and dehydrated. I'm going to die tomorrow.
Why is it pressure? I want to see your cute face and possibly sit on it. You make it like its a bad thing.
I'm so sorry to hear about your grandmother. Also how many grams are in an eighth?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
As your friend, I promise I will drink a full bottle of vodka and belly slide down the stairs with you if that test is positive
If you can give me an orgasm, you'll get a trophy.
I feel like I don't even know what's gonna happen when we first see each other. It'll be like explosions and glitter and a unicorn will run by pulling a sleigh of alcohol and sex.
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
Hey.... can you explain to me why when I woke up this morning my cell phone background had been changed to me getting a piggy back ride from a drag queen?