Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
Send us your Text From Last Night!
it was awkward when he was taking off my clothes and i had to help him undo my fanny pack
you walked into the party, and all you had on was your left sock... literally.
I think you threw up on me last night but i can't remember so i'm not mad at you.
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
Okay, but that still doesn't explain all the glitter in my puke.
Idk if you own a vibrator or anything but it's not smart to leave it in dad's car for him to find :/
All I'm saying is there better be a bow on your dick for my birthday
it's your last night here, let's make it one we may or may not remember.
Can you explain the Transformers set up for battle in my living room?
I think it may be easier if I stay drunk/high til the wedding. You game?
You tried to run away last night. The neighbors brought you back.you were in their hot tub again. This needs to stop
so in 24 hours i have gotten caught having sex in my car by a cop, almost burnt off my vag, almost got hit by a semi, and got fired. awesome.
im going to smoke a cigarette and reflect on my life choices
