So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
Send us your Text From Last Night!
I just typed 14 shots of Smirnoff into my calorie count toolbar. Then typed pole dancing 1.5hrs into the calorie burner search. Should break even.
Well, you're either very drunk or very high but I'll let it slide because I love any type of conversation concerning cheese.
this isnt the person you just texted but i have her phone. she disappeared when the bacon came home and she hasn't returned since.
21 Bartenders That Are Definitely Winning At Their Jobs
sweetheart all i remember is you throwing up and saying "i thought things would be better now that barack obama is president"
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
you walked into the kitchen holding the skyy bottle and asked us "how do i warm this?"
There are babies in the room i shouldnt be high with babies in the room.
I feel so much closer to you now that I heard your poop splash into the toilet.
25 Of The Most Cringeworthy Internet Stalking Fails
we've been dating more than a month and i just realized there's no hair on his chest..
you've had sex with him. you must've seen him naked.
nah, i feel like naked sex would be getting too serious for us..
you were having sex in the bathroom so i pee'd in your bong water...
Fail #1 I puked off the balcony onto the balcony below us and when I tried to pour water on it in the morning to wash it off it just went all over their deck. Sorry room 1342 but welcome to Jamaica
since we're both too lazy to go to each others house, you drink there, i'll drink here and we'll skype. it's the same thing.
i have a "get your shit together" dinner with my parents tonight. After that ill be down to party