his penis was the training wheels of my sex life
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I took a picture of his ID so i could remember how to spell his last name and facebook stalk him later...I think he saw me do it
I walk in to see her roommate half naked on their stripper pole. I knew I was home.
i just entered cocaine into my calorie counter.
25 Of The Most Cringeworthy Internet Stalking Fails
his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
I just made easy mac in my blender. Beat that.
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
Another night, another sound of my neighbor almost having an orgasm.
And she used to have such long ones. Sad.
21 People Who Barely Escaped Death
Pretending to care to care about playoffs in exchange for free shots. I'm sorry in advance.
you puked out of a dead sleep and didnt wake up
Is there a zoo near here? I need to see some penguins like right now..
I am not bailing you of of jail
is it bad that upon arriving to my fourth sex toy party the sex toy lady instantly recognizes me?
Its piss that you smell... I borrowed that shirt last week. Sooo, wanna grab some laundry soap on your way home? And good luck on your date.