just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
Send us your Text From Last Night!
No, I didn't like him that much. But I took one for the team. And by the team I mean me and my vagina.
I just reenacted what a cuntadactyl would act like by putting straws in my mouth as teeth and roaring, Plz come get me.
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
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For some reason I just don't think you going to the gay bar alone on thanksgiving is a good idea.
Apparently I joined a band last night. Definitely my favorite blackout.
He texted me for drugs this time. Not sex. I dunno if I should be pleased it's not sex or disappointed that I come across as a druggie
vaguely remember the bartender stopping me outside last night so he could pull the duct tape out of my hair
He snuck into my grandmothers house, broke her lamp, fucked me, then had breakfast with us the next morning. I am an awful granddaughter.
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Yea.. I remember nothing. Except that the taxi driver was 56 years old and apparently never cheated on his wife.
And there I was, sitting Indian style on the kitchen floor, my fingers covered in peanut butter.
I may be in pain from falling off the roof but getting to the morning roof keg was well worth it.
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
and now that ive poetically compared your vagina to a nuclear missile, I hope youre prepared for this date.