Naked chocolate chip pancake making. I just spilled mix all over the place. My boobs are covered in flour. This is not going well.
Send us your Text From Last Night!
I really wanna just be like, can you just eat me out and stop whining
I think that would solve a million problems
I just wanna get hammered somewhere crazy. Meet some chicks. Bang them and then go scuba diving.
I'm gonna face reality, tomorrow morning is not on my hungover agenda.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Turns out the owner of the bar that I fucked used to be on Boy Meets World, but now he's old and bald. So there's that..
If its possible to have a hickey on your nipple, I have one. Thank you.
my grandma just gave me a shoebox fulled to the top with tootsie rolls and condoms with a not that said "enjoy college, find a big cock" i'm not sure how I feel about this
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
If I don't have tequila in my hand soon, I'm going to have to violate human rights laws
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
sex, shower, sex, ice cream sandwiches?
What's the procedure for answering a booty call from someone under house arrest?
whose parrot is this?
It's official. Those are now your come fuck me flipflops
i just had to pick up my 18 year old cousin from the police station for hosting a party, and i had to do this stoned wow