The crooked penis I maybe could have looked past...but no foreplay? Deal breaker.
Send us your Text From Last Night!
I hope to God it's not the new neighbors having sex, because what I'm hearing sounds like a mildly defective vuvuzela or a cow giving birth.
There was a trampoline and tequila. It was glorious.
Made up a full house drinking game
On my way.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well yes he stayed. He brought Guiness, them he shaved me. It's a long, but beautiful story.
Have you ever just woke up in the morning and felt pregnant
No I did not just post a Craigslist ad for a used stripper pole because I can't afford my own. But now that you put the idea in my head I might have to.
Please don't judge me for my hormonal purchase, judge me for my awesome rack.
sometimes it's just necessary to be your own gyno when you're too afraid to tell your mom about your real life
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's a lady lying down on the sidewalk in front of our building smoking a cig
i thought you were just a really comfy body pillow until i sobered up. oops.
Well, I saw an Olympian's genitals tonight, so it can't be that bad.
Dude. Steinbecking. It's when you double-fist coffee and alcohol to help you meet a writing deadline.
I feel very compelled to cut off the person's ears that is sitting in front of me