I want to strut with the confidence of a pigeon.
Send us your Text From Last Night!
I can't believe I slept with a girl who has the words shucks in her vocabulary. I'm getting less picky by the day..
I’m turning 34 on Friday and I feel like the only thing I’ve accomplished in life so far is getting into pissing matches with clients
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
Who cares if he’s younger, he’s hung like a moose. Your vagina will never forgive you if you pass on that dick
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
Not having a reliable dick in is getting expensive. I’ve had to replace 3 vibrators since Mike and I split up
Just bought shot glasses from the thrift store. I think the guy buying a winter coat was even judging me.
why did you kick open the doors at church screaming whos ready to party?
I brought my porn computer to class by accident
How much porn do you watch if you need a special computer?
he broke off the kiss to ask "can I grab your boob?" like props for asking for clear and concise consent but there HAS to be a sexier way to do it
FYI - Don’t go in the downstairs bathroom. Ryan is passed out naked on the floor with a raging hard on.
Heard about your divorce. Let me know if I can do anything for you or your penis ;-)
Dude on the shuttle bus eating a Butterfinger and watch porn on his phone and doesn’t give a fuck who knows
We need to get on his level
