I just realized that this morning is the first morning i've put on underwear in a week.
I love summer.
So he asked me last night if I would cheer him on while he masturbated...
I'm sorry..where i come from learning how to exploit a wealthy middle aged man is a right of passage
I did the walk of shame to church this morning.
hooker boots and all?
Yep. People looked at me like I was the prodigal daughter returning home. Full of sins but welcome anyway.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Saying he's good in bed would be like saying Soulja Boy is a good rapper, completely unlogical if you've heard him.
This is a whole other level of drinking. Like the I used to eat paste with these people kinda drinking.
she made me take her to the grocery store to buy a gallon of sweet tea and a shit ton of band aids, the cashier asked if someone was hurt and she replied "not yet.."
Have you ever tried running while drinking 151?
COME HERE WE MELTED A CORONA BOTTLE WITH FIREWORKS
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Face washed and sleeping pill taken. Here's hoping for a more sex filled tomorrow.
CUM CAME OUT OF MY NOSE. MY SINUSES ARE ENTIRELY FUCKED UP NOW BC OF THE CUM TRAVELING IN PLACES IT SHOULD NOT HAVE.
On another note, I almost lost one side of my fake butt. Dancing the wobble with the fake butt isn't recommend.
he was like tryna hang and chat and I was like dude there's an iguana in this room
You still owe me one bodily function mess clean up.
You pee on the floor one time and you never hear the end of it...
I think you know you’ve caught feelings when you’re asking a tinder boy his opinion about your current fuck buddy.
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