Pennsylvania now holds the distinct honor of being the third state I've crapped my pants in.
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he called me 'mate' and i had to remind him that you dont call people mate who continously make your dick hard
We are the best cocktail. We look appealing, taste amazing, and ruin lives.
Woke up in a hotel room with some random guy then walked over a mile to the bus stop where I laid down and waited on the bus. GREAT NIGHT
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'll screw just about anything, but I draw the line there
the worst part about living alone is not having other peoples snacks to mooch off of when you havent gone grocery shopping in three weeks. i'm so pms-y i'm about to eat a soy sauce packet
Do exhausted, barely concealed hand jobs count as joining the mile high club?
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
Next time you have him paint you an outfit so you can do you walk the street naked TAKE A SHOWER BEFORE YOU GET IN THE BED. MY sheets look like like an acid trip
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Last night I had a sex dream about Trudeau, he hasn't even been prime minister for 24 hours
do I look like a person who has full control of their limbs and existence on this plane of reality
They need to eat meat, go down on me the first time, every time, and know how to pull my hair. And there's a height requirement for this ride
I was asked last night if Magnum makes a XXL..... I don't think I've ever broken this many condoms in my life
And I am bleeding like slutty girl #1 In a horror movie