I can't go to the bars anymore. She wanted to see me again and I drunkenly told her I was moving today. If she spots me I'm fucked.
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No biggie, just trying to keep my liver function in the green
Although can we find me a starter dick? I don't want security showing up again. That was awkward.
after stripping the bed and soaking it with the "pet spot remover" I have, I decided in the best interest of my mattress and our drunk friends bladders, i should invest in rubber sheets.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sometimes I refuse to go through a door until someone holds it open for me because I'm a fucking lady.
He's hot....knda sweaty, drunk smells like feet....but he's hung like a whale....so in other words totally your type
I got a charlie horse in my ass while masturbating. We are never been going to that boot camp again.
Is it weird that sometimes I like to have sex for the health benefits and workout more than the pleasure
Good god, my descendants are going to be fucked.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean you can one up her. Instead of ruining friendships you can ruin marriages.
I don't think he understands that his kid doesn't bother me. I have a binder full of developmentally appropriate early childhood activities.
Either go for divorced men who are forty plus or stop doing this immediately. You are 23 years old. You need more wine and less baby fever
I'm currently in h&m wondering "what exactly is the class level of a swingers resort?"
FUCK the WHO, FUCK cancer, I'm gonna eat fucking bacon.
We're going to ride the bus of mixed signals all the way to unrequited love town and that's where I'm going to live my life and then die.