I need someone to sew my vagina shut until I'm responsible enough to use it
Send us your Text From Last Night!
I got so drunk last night I took a ice bath with my mother in law
The magician guy on probation is here at the bar. I'm gonna get him to show me a trick
Floor bacon is actually really good
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Costco cheesecake and whisky. A night made in heaven
TYLER OWES ME SO MUCH
I LET A CREEPY MAN I DONT KNOW SUCK ON MY NIPPLES
WHY THE FUCK DID I HAVE TO FALL IN LOVE WITH A CONVICT
sweet Jesus, who thought 13 martinis was a good idea? 11 was probably sufficient.
Yeah bc that's when u should take a Molly. At a house party with everyone from ur hometown
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
If a cop comes up to me I'm whipping out my cock, swinging it around and singing the national anthem
I'm so upset I left my sombrero at the expo center
What's worse having drunken sex with hot married man or breaking the diet one week in?
You know it's been a rough week when you funnel beers by yourself.