He texted "fuck you" before blocking me on all social media. Come to think of it, that's also the last thing my mother said to me. Could it be that I'm the problem?
Send us your Text From Last Night!
Banged former boss. Adulthood achievement unlocked.
I'm actually more excited that I had so much sex this weekend that my ovaries hurt
I can't believe that after 9 years of signing things as "BATMAN", the first place to turn it down was the liquor store down the block.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wanna hang out. The cats don't talk back.
I just had sex on my divorce papers. I've never felt so poetic.
You have the most beautiful penis I've ever seen. I never thought penises were meant to be beautiful, but you proved me wrong
What happened last night and why am I partially covered in queso?
It got weird the panthers lost and we started throwing wings at one another
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My ex is having a baby and I'm over here planning my dogs birthday celebration...
When is the party?
Casually blacked out last night and apparently told him he couldn't come back to bed until he got me Taco Bell.
You know you hit Mardi Grad bottom when you come to in someone's kitchen on the floor and you are eating gumbo out of a Mixing bowl with a ladle......yeah rock fucking bottom
New fact of life: getting Becca high never helps any situation at all ever.
When I got home he was in his underpants on the couch, eating pop tarts and crying while watching Voltron.