How do you get the "hangs out with drunk assholes" insurance
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The part where he comes over and ignores you isn't what makes me mad about that story... It's the fact that he ate your tacos, AND THEN proceeded to ignore you. That's cold hearted.
I'm just so full of love and alcohol
I hooked up with a guy named Quan.. I literally hit the Quan
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Please don't bang more than two exes at a time, just so I won't get confused.
I'm just gonna ride this ego train to sex town
YAS. BRING CRAB.
I explained to him that me turning straight is a once a year thing. And this boy just happens to be the chosen one.
I know that you sometimes make decisions based on comedic effect, but losing your virginity shouldn't be one of them.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He just started dry humping the air... I'm done
When he mumbled "I can't feel my legs," proceeded to stand, fall over, and just lay there I knew I'd given great head...
That's like a fucking falcon or some shit. I don't know birds but I know that is not a bird you fuck with.
Nothing more awkward that being butt ass naked in a guys bed and his ex wife shows up with his kid....
I walked in and saw her crying and singing to her dog