I'm nothing if not determined to sleep with everyone at that company
Send us your Text From Last Night!
Where is Holly?
Nevermind. i can hear her having sex two doors down
Should I apologize to him for saying I wanted to punch him in the face as I was digging through the trash?
WHAT IS ALL THIS WATER BOTTLE FLIPPING NONSENSE? WHAT IS LIT?
29 Frat Parties That Got Way Too Out Of Control
I don't know when he had the time to do it but he dug a hole in our basement like the shawshank redemption
Sex to movie scores is my best choice of the year. You've had an orgasm but have you had an orgasm with an entire orchestra.
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
Your vagina is not a steamboat from the 1800's
how drunk are you?
15 Ridiculous Ways Broke People Managed to Make a Buck
I'm actually really happy I can say that my first body shot was out of a gay strippers massively ripped chest
We laughed, we cried, we fucked, we shirked our familial and work related responsibilities. They could make a movie about the last 40 hours of our lives.
Btw, the reason I have a black eye is bc I needed to puke so hard yesterday morning; I whipped up the toilet seat so fast that I railed myself in the face. Then spent the rest of the day more carefully puking. Kind of why I'm not in the mood for drinking.
That awkward moment when your drug dealer pulls your boss out of the snow
He wore a t-shirt that had an arrow pointing to his crotch and "DO IT FOR THE VINE" on it.
At least he's honest about how long he'll last.