Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
Then he shook the next streetlight but this one broke and fell over. He told me, "This is the part where we run."
So there I was praying he didn't go limp again, choking on a long, long gray ball hair. This is my Saturday night. This. Is. My. Life.
come pick me up. please. i just puked in my lap. bring pants.
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And I don't know what it is about weed making me want every episode of the real housewives of everywhere
Oh yeah and one of the strippers brought you chips and water when you were passes out next to the toilet. So that was nice
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
dont ever smoke after you drink again... i dont think ive ever seen...or heard of someone throwing up and farting at the same time. that is, if you were farting.
Well I'm currently debating between getting toilet paper or getting my eyebrows waxed so... There's that
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The original plan involved fireworks and a lot more dildos but the new one is still okay.
It's 2:30 on a Friday afternoon. It's snowing and must be about 20 degrees outside. I'm sitting in this class with 300 people using up every ounce of energy and willpower not to puke all over the girl in front of me. This has got to stop.
Lucky for you, I found your phone.....Not so lucky for you, it was in the bottom of your vomit-filled trashcan.
They finally caught us and banned us forever, but it was worth it because we didn't have to pay for light bulbs for at least 3 years.
So you stole light bulbs, from your favorite bar, and got banned, and you're happy?
Look we couldnt pay for light bulbs and ramen, and you can't eat light bulbs or cook in the dark. Win - win.
The only pictures he has from one of the biggest football weekends is an album titled "I miss my dog" filled with tons of pictures of his dog and him. This relationship must end.