Three guys came up to me at the bar and started dancing on me, while screaming "Johnson's girl." That's the last time I sleep with a freshmen.
Calling a preemptive no homo on tonight's activities
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
he fingered my asshole thinking it was my vag...I couldn't bring myself to tell him, mostly from shame for me and pity for him
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If the world ends now I want you to know I was on my favorite toilet fighting the good fight.
I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
But you're the one who should be jamming foreign objects into my vaj instead of an old weird lady. I mean, it is your birthday....
so we were having anal, both very very drunk when he started shouting his roomates name
Will the fact that I have 4 boob hickies add to or take away from tonight's outfit?
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So if you ever need to know a guy who knows a guy who knows a guy that can put a 24oz beer can up his ass... Hit me up...
Hey man sorry I got all grabby
Take a good hard look at your life. And the number of 18-20 year olds that you have made out with in the last 6 months... and then keep doing whatever the fuck you want.
Dick sucking on arrival? or would you like to cash that in later?
I should start wearing my Batman shirt more often when I drink. Good things happen. All sorts of shit.